Never Be Together
by chinese-bell-flower
Summary: This story is about Kikyo's POV from the moment she came back to earth from hell. its not like how it is in the animemanga, just so u know. plz R&R!
1. Ch1: Once Again

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters in "Inuyasha" or any of the songs I'm going to put in this fic so don't sue me!  
  
A/N: ok this is my 1st fic like this so it might not be that good. Its all from Kikyo's POV. When I type ***blahblahblah*** its the song. I've found lot's of great songs perfect for Kikyo but it doesn't fit what happens in this chap so I made this song myself. I know it sucks but wateva! There's not really a pairing but this fic's bout Kikyo. R&R! Now on with the fic! ^_^  
  
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Chapter 1: "Once Again"  
  
***you went away and so did I never thinking we'd meet again we both somehow came back and regained all our pain***  
  
That day, that god awful day. I was awoken from my peace. I was peaceful and without any troubles. Sure, I was in hell, but I had no worries, no thoughts, I was.nothing. I didn't mind, I was finally happy and free of all the pain I felt when I was alive. Being dead, I had no emotions; I couldn't feel the emptiness in my heart and soul because I was without you.  
  
My heart and soul rose and I was implanted in a body of me made of earth and bones. When I awoke from my 50 years of slumber, I was furious. But then, I saw you and for a fraction of a second, my heart jumped with joy just before my hatred for you and your betrayal came to my memory.  
  
***I was lost and thought you were too but didn't bother to speak to you***  
  
I realized I was somehow.on earth again. I had my soul, my heart, and my pain back. But I was not alive. I asked myself How? Why? I lifted my clay hands up to feel my clay face. How cold and utterly disgusting it felt, but I did not care. I immediately focused my deep brown eyes to you. Oh how I still hated you. How I wished you were dead. And yet, somewhere in my heart, I wanted to be with you more than ever. But I could not let my weaknesses show. That would be my downfall.  
  
***awoken from my peaceful dreams I did not know it wasn't all it seems***  
  
I lunged at you knowing I could kill you with my bare hands. But u dodged and for some reason, I did not try again. I just let it be. Kaede rushed to me in sheer joy and surprise while you just.stood there.  
  
That night, I lay on a branch of the Goshinboku and thought to myself. No one asked how or why or even bothered to talk to me except my dear sister. I thought you would at least ask for the jewel and I would tell you I don't have it anymore. I thought maybe you didn't care about it anymore. More importantly, how are you still here? Did I not pin you to the sacred tree 50 years ago? All these thoughts in my head drifted me into a light slumber.  
  
***though I am full of hate and pain I fell in love with you once again***  
  
The next morning, all my questions from the other night was answered.  
  
I woke from the sounds of laughter and cheers. I stood on the highest branch of the Goshinboku to see what all the commotion was about. The sounds came from the direction of the well. I saw a few joyous people and a girl in odd looking clothes and a bag climb out of the well. I quickly jumped from the tree to another tree closer to the well so I could get closer look. I did not see the girl's face but I saw you. You ran to her and embraced her in your arms. She cuddled in your warm chest and smiled happily.  
  
***you broke my heart and betrayed my trust for her and your demonic lust***  
  
I gasped in shock and.pain? Pain from what? Did I care she was with you? Did I still have feelings for you after all that you have done? Do I---  
  
My train of thoughts were broken when I saw what was in the bag she carried over her shoulders. They were shards. Shards of the Shikon No Tama.  
  
Now I understood. She freed you from the Goshinboku. You did not ask me about the jewel because you knew I didn't have it and that she did. And you did not care for me because you were with.her.  
  
***why do I still care for your heart if you are with her and we are apart***  
  
Who was this girl? This girl who has everything I had and more. She had you. Who was this god-dammed girl who replaced me? WHO?!? She turned around and I saw her face. At that very moment, I froze.  
  
***though I am full of hate and pain I fell in love with you once again***  
  
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A/N: hmm.that came out better than I thought! Review plz! This fic has no Kikyo or kagome bashing so plz keep reading. THANX! 


	2. Ch2: Long Ago

A/N: heheh, sry I haven't put up this chapter sooner. My life suddenly became sooo complicated and I was too busy to write another chapter. I started getting to caught up in my social life and now I'm not as into Inuyasha as I was before.*sniff sniff* sad isn't it? Oh well. It's winter break right now so my life's not as busy so I decided I should start righting again. I jus hope this chapter will be as good as the last one (since I'm not so into inuyasha anymore I might not put as much feeling into the story) anyways, last time I forgot to mention that this story is NOT just the real story (like in the anime) with some thoughts of kikyo. Every event is all original and made up by me.  
  
the song used in this chapter is called "Long Ago" by Mariah Carey. Now on with the story.  
  
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Chapter 2: "Long Ago"  
  
***Once upon a time  
  
You whispered softly in my ear  
  
Loving words and fairytales  
  
That I longed to hear***  
  
She turned around and I saw her face. At that very moment, I froze.  
  
She was.she was.me? No! it couldn't be! But.her face, she looks just like me! How could this be?  
  
***I gave you my body and soul  
  
And you took control  
  
As you slowly swept me up  
  
And carried me away ***  
  
"Kikyo! May ye please come down here for a moment? I would like ye to meet someone," shouted Kaede up the tree I was standing on.  
  
I jumped down the tree and followed Kaede. She led me to the well where Inuyasha and that girl were.  
  
Kaede gestured towards the girl, "Kikyo, this is Kagome. Ye might have noticed that she looks very much like ye. That is because, she is ye reincarnation." Kaede explained it all. She explained about where the girl comes from, what happened to the jewel, everything. Which, for some reason, made me dislike the girl even more.  
  
"Kagome, this is Kikyo," Kaede said, as she gestured towards me.  
  
The girl, Kagome, held her hand forward to shake mine, "hi, nice to meet you! ^^"  
  
I looked down at her hand, then up at her, then I looked at Inuyasha.  
  
I didn't say anything to anyone. I just walked around the girl and stared at her like a vulture stares at its pray. She didn't look worried, but Inuyasha looked at me like he was going to attack me if I went any closer to the girl. I could tell I wasn't wanted, by Inuyasha anyways, so I left and went back to the Goshinboku tree.  
  
***You told me pretty lies  
  
As I held onto you tight  
  
You knew how to get your way  
  
Ignorance was bliss in your warm embrace***  
  
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That night, I watched as Inuyasha tucked Kagome in and kissed her goodnight. I did not want to see anymore of this immature little girl with Inuyasha. I did not want her to haunt my dreams as well. So I lay down on a branch of the Goshinboku and closed my eyes, about to drift to sleep.  
  
***Long ago  
  
You used to want me  
  
Now it's all so far away  
  
But you still haunt me  
  
And take me back to yesterday ***  
  
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"Kikyo! Kikyo! Wake up!"  
  
I heard my name and opened my eyes to see Inuyasha standing below the Goshinboku calling me to come down. I jumped down beside him and stared at his beautiful golden eyes shine in the moonlight and his soft, long silver hair swaying in the gentle summer breeze. Oh, how handsome he looks. Oh, how I lov---NO! I must not give in to these feelings! He is a demon! A beast! He betrayed me and took advantage of my trust, and my love. He deserves nothing more than to die at my grasp!  
  
I raised my hand, wanting to choke him to death right there and then. But, I could not do it. I just couldn't! no matter how hard I try, I just can't bring myself to hurt him. But, why? I wanted to bring him to his death. I wanted to with all my heart, I really did! Or.did I?  
  
***Every now and then  
  
I drown in thoughts of yesterday  
  
And the fools' paradise that you blew away  
  
I feel you beside me again  
  
And remember when you came to my window  
  
On a dark and stormy day***  
  
I lowered my hand to hear what he came here to talk to me about.  
  
He stared at me from top to bottom with his mouth half open and his eyes shimmering. I grew impatient.  
  
"Speak! I don't have all night! Do you have something to tell me or not?!?" I yelled at him.  
  
"Kikyo, I.I." he stuttered.  
  
"Well? What is it?"  
  
Suddenly, he lept towards me and embraced me. I could feel his muscled arms wrapped tightly around me and his firm chest. I could almost hear his heart pounding, and mine too. for a moment, I felt warm and almost alive again. But then, I came back to reality and quickly pushed him away.  
  
***Baby, I need you now  
  
Tonight I'm crumbling down  
  
Sinking in the memories  
  
Shadows of you keep washing over me***  
  
"Do not touch me, u beast! Do you have something important to tell me? If not, leave my presence this instant!" I shouted.  
  
"Kikyo, I've.I've.missed you." Inuyasha said.  
  
"You've missed me? Ha! Liar! If you have ever cared for me at all, then why did you betray me?" I felt my eyes watering and teardrops starting to fall and swiftly turned away and continued my rambling, "How dare you Inuyasha? You said you loved me!"  
  
"I didn't betray you! It was Naraku!"  
  
"Naraku? You dare lie to me even more? You dare blame your mistakes on some innocent man?"  
  
"But Kikyo! It's true! Ask Kaede! Ask anyone! Ask Kagome!"  
  
"Hmm.Kagome. That wretched little girl. You love HER now. Do you not?"  
  
"Kikyo I---"  
  
"NO! I do not want to hear anymore of your lies! Leave me at once!"  
  
"but, but---"  
  
"LEAVE ME!"  
  
***Long ago  
  
You used to want me  
  
Now it's all so far away  
  
But you still haunt me***  
  
As Inuyasha fled away, I sat at the bottom of the Goshinboku and let my tears flow. Why are these tears running? How could I still care about anything Inuyasha says? How could I still care for such a monster?  
  
All these pleading thoughts and tears led me to sleep.  
  
***Long ago  
  
You used to want me  
  
Now it's all so far away  
  
But you still haunt me  
  
And take me back to yesterday***  
  
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A/N: Wow. That actually wasn't half bad considering I'm not so into this anymore. Heheh. Well review and let me know wat u think ok? Hope u liked it! ^^ 


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